I happen to be a very talkative person. Heather once told me that she found it interesting how I could go on, and on, and on, because she couldn't do that. It's funny because I really do that - I always seem to have stuff I want to say.
I enjoy talking. I enjoy letting people into my life by telling them what I'm thinking and feeling and I love when they are interested and will listen and care about what I'm saying.
The problem is, until Heather pointed it out to me I wasn't very good at listening. I would get so caught up in what I was saying that I wouldn't even notice when my friends wanted to say something.
But I started working on this as soon as Heather mentioned this out to me. It wasn't very easy at first - I would have to stop talking and ask what she was saying when I so wanted to say what ever it was I had been saying. It got easier, however, and now I think I just may enjoy it even more than talking! I enjoy knowing what's going on with my friends - what they're feeling, going through, etc. And my friends enjoy knowing that I'll listen to them if they need to talk.
Listening isn't always easy. When something really amazing just happened and you want to tell your friend, but then you realize that they are having a bad day it is very hard to put aside what you were going to say and take the time to listen to them, but sometimes this is just what your friend needs. It takes a sacrifice on your part, yes, but isn't that what real love is? Jesus died on the cross for you, is it really so hard to save what you were going to say for a little bit if it makes your friend happy?
Putting aside your own thoughts to listen can be especially hard if your friend will not talk much. I've had my share of this - feeling as if I have to drag every word out of my friend - but this, too, gets better. As your friends realize that they can talk to you and you'll listen, they'll talk more. You won't have to drag stories out of them, they'll willingly go to you when they have a problem - and that is one of the best feelings in the world!
So the next time you're talking with a friend, why not take a few minutes to ask them about their day - more than just "How was your day?" "Good." "That's good. Today I did such and such and etc." - and really listen when they answer?
4 comments:
Me thinks you and I switch in a way. Now you listen well wherein I do not...I need to start working on that once again :-P. Thanks for the reminder, my dear Watson - oh and the post was wonderful!!! Terribly sorry I did not have time to review it before as you wanted..
You listen to me, Sherlock! You always listen when I want to talk! And I don't mind you talking lots - rather I like it. It's nice to be quiet and listen and hear all about my friends for once. :-)
Thanks for the comment! I'm glad you liked the post! And it's alright that you didn't have time to review it, I understand. :D
Oh that is a hard one, buttoning my mouth and listening. Just 'cause I am quiet doesn't mean I listen. In fact, a lot of the time I'm not listening -- I'm thinking, "Oh...I hope so-and-so hurries this story up. I don't want to forget to tell her about such-and-such."
Thanks for the reminder, I need to listen more and not have such an attitude -- even if it's only in my head. Though, I think people can see though my smile more than I think, knowing I am not all together sincere.
Love you girls!!
Your sister in Christ,
Molly
as someone who struggles with listening as well as I talk, I can empathize with you, and think your attitude toward it very mature.
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